VLCP Day 7: Supplement review

I am trying to use a few supplements/practices to enhance my hcg protocol. Here are the ones I am using and how they helped me.

Green coffee beans: 800 mg twice a day. I feel like it is a great energy kick with no jitters. Out makes the diet twice as easy to follow IMHO.

Skin brushing: Definite cleansing and skin tightening effect. I don't miss lotion since the skin brushing keeps my skin so soft.

Triphala: Keeps me regular, and is not addictive or problematic with intestinal flora. I highly recommend this.

Probiotics: I generally take these regularly for immune function and GI health, but am hopeful that I can also get rid of excess candida during my protocol.

Msm emergen-c: For skin tightening and immune function.

Callanetics/Pilates: This has really helped my back. It's very gentle, and an easy workout promoting tone without a huge energy expenditure. I stick to shorter workouts.

I currently am fighting a cold. Things like this generally derail a protocol for me, but I don't think that will happen this time. I read somewhere that you MUST do 23 days or you risk gaining all the weight and then some. This makes perfect sense to me. The first time I did the protocol I cheated so much but I finished it. I never gained it back until recently with all of these uncompleted protocols. So now with more at stake, I feel more prepared than ever.

Skin Brushing: A Love Story

So today is day 6 on my current VLCP on hcg. My total loss is 7 pounds and currently TOM is in full swing. I ran out of drops for a whole day, so the timing on that couldn't have been better.

I have between skin brushing every morning. I found a link with picture instructions: http://greensmoothiegirl.com/articles/healthy-habits/skin-brushing/

It. Is. Wonderful. I had tried it before with the simple "brush toward the heart" instructions, but using these instructions have made a difference I never had seen. My skin is soft and glowing, I'm not at all constipated, and when I do it, I feel so great. Its likemaking peace with my body, every part. Spending a few second just on my thighs, or hips, or abdomen . . . like saying, "thank you, thighs, for supporting me, hips, thanks for supporting my pregnancies, let me take care of you now. Abdomen, you've been through it with the surgeries and babies. Thank you for your hard work."

I felt positive all day. I recommend the skin brushing on so many levels.

VCLP day 6. Setbacks and Improvements

So the bad first. I weighed today. I felt really bad because I had decided to not weigh at least until Monday. I feel like I let myself down because that was the commitment I made for myself. I am so tired of this life; of binging and relying on fluid as an emotional crutch. I told a friend today that I would rather lose this dependence to dieting and emotional eating than I would to lose weight. So I have to keep that focus in front of me. I can succeed with that as a goal. I can succeed a lot quicker than I can lose 100 pounds. So I need to make sure at all times that is where my focus is staying.
I did lose 10 pounds.
Successes! I just ate half of my chicken, realized I was full and stepped away. I don't know when I've been able to do that. Let's see If I can do that with every meal?

I just got this quote from a friend of a friend on Facebook and I had to add it here.  Because there are mashed potatoes in the refrigerator calling my name.

Ádìsá Ájámú

It is a horrible thing to feel stuck, to feel as though the life you desire is right within our grasps, close enough for us to see it, brush up against it, feel it but not be able to grasp it. If we understand that much of our lives are the result of choices we've made--good and bad. Then it helps us understand that wekeep getting the lack of results we've gotten thus far in life because we keep doing what we've doing. Different life results require a different life actions. It's that simple—and that hard. Life is about choices and chances, the ones we make and take, and the ones we don't. The life you desire is waiting patiently for you to change. Go get your bliss.

- Ádìsá

How To Feed My Hungry Soul

VLCD 4: Today was pretty good.  I've been struggling with being tired and last night resorted to taking a Benadryl at 2a.m. I am pretty much POP, although I do use a little non stick coconut oil spray.

I am really grappling with my mind set. I feel like I am on one side of a cliff, holding on to negativity, desperation about weight loss, self doubt and I'm looking across a chasm and on the other side are all of my gifts; creativity, self love, friendships, trust, a lives while person. What is in between me and me self actualized, productive life?

Not my weight. I think it's the distractions of technology and my tendency to plan plan plan. Rather than just be zen and explore my creative productive side, I fill my time calculating pounds that I should lose. I fill my time on Facebook. I watch television shows filled with commercials and messages that I am not enough.

I want to jump this chasm.

Goals: Consider a daily limit for social media.
Limit television to preplanned viewing.
Quit thinking about the next weight loss plan.

I will update and revisit these goals.

Feeling good. Make that great.

I just watched Robin's most recent videos and I recommend them very highly. Look up weight loss apocalypse on YouTube. Her channel is both inspiring and insightful. These last two videos really focused on the feeling of desperation around weight loss and what that leads to: extreme dieting, binging, and shame. This desperation is directly connected to consumerism our view of ourselves through the eyes of the media. This led me to think about this: what does it look like to lead a consumer based life versus a production based life? What if there was desperation for creativity and personhood rather than looks and weight?

Consumer based:
I'm not good enough
I'm not beautiful enough (buy to look better)
My house isn't nice enough
My kids aren't smart enough
I need to be entertained/consume entertainment
Artificial relationships which are easy (i.e. Social media, television)
Beauty is scarce, expensive, created
Others are more talented
Talent is scarce
My value is external
My self worth depends on external things

Production Based:
Contentment
I'm good enough
I'm beautiful, I find beauty within myself
My hard work makes my house nice
I use creative means to generate entertainment, conversation, writing, games, knitting, playing music.
I produce the means on entertainment
I enjoy real and meaningful relationships and work to cultivate them
Beauty is abundant and everywhere
I have special talents as does everyone
My value and self worth are my qualities and who I an as a person

Which would you choose? Which would you be desperate for?

Day 8! Feeling great!!

Wow, I need to learn to use this blogger app. I was just trying to edit an old post for punctuation. This is from months ago.

Tomorrow is the day I put the scale away.  I have resolved that I will only weight every other week.  This Saturday, I will take measurements, next Saturday, I weigh.

I cheated AGAIN due to stress but you know what? For this round it's all about the follow through. I will do the 40 days because that was my commitment. And I still am not going to weight myself. Worry doesn't go away but this is the time that I must learn to deal  with  it